Musings on Disability

I am 68 years old with a disability, cerebral palsy and severe arthritis, and I lead a

pleasant life, going to UC Berkeley, enjoying the closeness of family and friends, and creating

art work. But, I feel that I should never have been born. This feeling comes and goes in the

background of my psyche -- ever ready to spring into action, negating otherwise happy

experiences -- to remind me of my unfortunate experiences. This feeling is ever lurking, ready

to strike to steal the show. Like a drop of ink in clear water, these subliminal messages taint my

existence. The effect of this -- a blow to the stomach, a lessening of happiness, ever ready to

overflow my rational facilities -- the feeling that I never should have been born.


You mentioned in class last week that you attended a Chicago meeting which was

concerned with new medical technology in obstetrics to detect genetic disorders in the unborn

fetus. The parent-to-be has a choice, carrying a possibly disabled fetus or aborting it. These

tests can be flawed. The logic behind this genetic procedure is genetic infanticide -- to get rid of

disability, to create in America a society of health and normal people, producing a homogenized

culture with no diversity and no aberration from the ideal. The result, a utopia similar to science

fiction -- the creation of a master race. This proposal reeks of eugenics and fascism that operates

on the female pregnant body -- action that takes place in the womb eliminating the different, the

other. Is there no safe place for life in our society? We are always under surveillance and

regulated in the process of normalization, affected by biopower. Even the womb is penetrated.

The disabled fetus "offed" by selective abortion, gotten rid of, not polluting the gene pool of the

nation state.


The conference you attended in Chicago included a space for the differently embodied,

the deviants, who aspired to live out their lives and enjoy their well being in our society. But I

contend that a disabled fetus, like me, should not be born. I base this opinion about selective

abortion of a disabled fetus on my experiences. I am probably wrong, but I must be true to my

own experience as a person living with disability. My argument is based on my own self worth.

I see this selective abortion as a choice, a reproductive right not to bring a defective fetus to

birth. My argument: there is a lot of suffering in the world, why add to it?